Romance scams

Scammers join social media sites and dating apps to set up fake profiles. They build relationships with people, then ask for money.

 

What is a romance scam?

Fraudsters spend time building up relationships online by chatting to people in a way that gains trust. Someone caught up in the scam might not know what’s happening, and their family and friends can’t help if they don’t know about it.

Once they earn a person’s trust, they can influence them to take actions like sending money.

Only a fraudster will ask for sensitive information, such as passport details or bank account access.

Know what to look out for

Is their profile a fake?

Fraudsters often seem genuine by being friendly and sharing personal details that appear real. They can steal and use other people’s photos for their profile, which makes it look more convincing.

If you’re not sure, remember you can use the reverse image search on Google. This shows you if the picture appears somewhere else on the internet under someone else’s name.

Secret identities

Romance scams work because fraudsters don’t reveal who they really are. It’s rare for a scammer to even talk on the phone.

They might say they want to meet and even make plans, but it never actually happens.

They ask for money

Romance scammers build trust over time. They chat to people to form relationships and gain power, making it easier to ask for money.

They make up a fake problem that means they need money. It’s usually something like unpaid bills or the cost of meeting up. Avoid sending money to someone you don’t know in real life.

They're keen to chat elsewhere

You can report someone on a social media site, dating site or app. So, scammers often suggest leaving to chat on another app or messaging service. Avoid sharing your number, if you don’t feel the person is genuine.

They’ll often use the same messages to chat with lots of different people, to gather information.

They tell you to keep the relationship secret

Fraudsters try to control things by preventing someone from telling others about a relationship. They may isolate a person by asking them to share intimate details or photos.

If you enter an online relationship, don’t keep it a secret. Tell your family or a reliable friend from your offline life. Them knowing about it will help keep you safe.

Mary's story

This is a true story that shows how common romance scams work.

“I joined a Facebook group of a film I loved and a member called Paul sent a private message. We stayed in the group until Paul suggested WhatsApp, where our chat became more about our lives.

We messaged daily and Paul shared photos of himself, some with his daughter. We even spoke on the phone, but Paul never wanted to video call.

Sadly, Paul’s bank account was blocked and he couldn’t get any money. He sent photos of bank statements showing £1 million was due to clear and more in savings. I agreed to help and sent gift cards and some money.

Then suddenly, Paul’s daughter fell ill and needed an urgent kidney transplant. I saw photos of her in hospital and the doctor caring for her sent a message. Paul was overseas with the army. He asked me to pay the hospital bill, promising to pay me back when his bank was okay to use again. I said yes and had to send money to a lady named Monique, who dealt with the payments for the hospital.

I couldn’t afford to send anymore, but Paul suggested I get a loan. This made me nervous, so I told my daughter who made me realise I’d been the victim of a romance scam.

I ended the relationship but lost over £14,500. If I hadn’t told my family, I could have lost a lot more than just my money.

It took me a while to get over Paul, but I’m happy now and with someone I’ve met in person who loves me. If a relationship feels pressured or secretive, never be afraid to talk to someone about it as it could be a fraudster.”

Help for victims of romance scams

It’s not just losing money that hurts with a romance scam. Finding out that a relationship is not real can cause upset, embarrassment and shame.

But there’s nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. Romance scams happen more than you’d think.

To report a romance scam, call Action Fraud on 0300 123 2040 or visit actionfraud.police.uk in England and Wales. In Scotland, you can contact the police on 101.

Always phone 999 in an emergency.

Learn about other scams and how to protect yourself

Scam calls

Learn how fraudsters use your details to win your trust.

Avoid scam calls

Scam emails and texts

Fraudsters try to steal your details through emails and texts.

Avoid scam messages

Pension scams

Fraudsters can pretend to be a company or adviser to target your pension.

Protect your pension

Investment scams

Fraudsters may pretend to be a genuine company or adviser.

Avoid investmenrt scams

Protect your devices

Learn how to keep your devices safe.

Learn about device safety

Protect your identity

Fraudsters might try to steal your personal and banking details.

Keep your identity safe

Learn about the latest scams

Fraudsters are always looking for new ways to try to steal your details and money. Discover which scams are common right now.

Go to latest scams

Have you been targeted by fraudsters

Contact us right away if you think you’ve been scammed. We can then guide you on what to do next.

Contact us now

Stay scam safe

Discover how to spot and avoid scams, and how to report fraud.

Protect yourself from fraud

Stay scam safe

Discover how to spot and avoid scams, and how to report fraud.

Protect yourself from fraud